#really frustrating when people say we learned this you just didn't pay attention

[inconsistently--consistent]

The curtains are just blue discourse drives me a little bit mad. I think OP was very clear in their criticism of the way teachers often approach symbolism and interpretation, that their is one true answer and it is their own. When often, a good work has many layers and ways to interpret different symbols. The focus should be on proving your assertion not finding the interpretation your teacher likes.

Additionally, many books taught in English class purposely do not have a lot of deeper meaning because the target audience is believed to be unable to find it. For example, most of the stories I was tested on had a very obvious blaring answer and little room for true analysis.

I understand why teachers do this, it's a bad situation to be trying to teach critical thinking and they usually do not get to choose their curriculum.

To watch so many go "you're the idiot for thinking the curtains are ever just blue" misses the key point of the post. At least, I think, I haven't been able to find the original post and make sure so I'm going off my memory.

TLDR: It's really frustrating when you have a lot of self-righteous people going "you didn't get the point of English class/ the curtains" when it seems they didn't get the point of the original post.

[affableramen]

tsundere genshin men react to your change of appearance

crack, pre-relationship pantalone, wriothesley, capitano, dainsleif

Pantalone

Upon seeing you enter the office and walk to your cubicle in the sleek outfit a week ago you would have detested, Pantalone’s jaw drops and the slight shake of his hand guilts him into spilling his freshly prepared espresso onto the floor.

The glossy leather of your outwear has him stunned and the way you dyed your hair into a completely opposite colour to what it had been before, makes the banker speechless. If it were not for the closest standing subordinate to notice, Pantalone would have not minded the espresso staining the carpet. Being suddenly brought to reality, with enormous will power he tears his look off your crimson lips and pay attention to the mess he had done over his desk, spilling his own drink so immaturely. 

During the break Pantalone comes to you discreetly, making sure you are alone in the smoking area. 

“Impressive. A sudden change of heart, I believe?”

You responded with a subtle glint of proudness in your eyes.

“Just reconsidered a few things in my wardrobe. Glad you approve.”

“I don’t mind the lips but your jacket seems too much for me. Makes you look like a bad girl.”

“You don’t like bad girls?”

“Didn’t quite say that”, Pantalone puffs smoke. And who of you two is a bad guy right now, huh? Definitely the one who is smoking. “The outfit is pretty. You did well.”

“Thanks. Though, I don’t think it was worth spilling your coffee”, you smile.

“It was my employee’s mistake, the desk was too wet, the cup slipped”, Pantalone feigns frustration.

“I’m so sorry this happened to you. Carpet cleaning is not exactly cheap.”

In the light of the bitter game of back and forth with you Pantalone bites his lip preventing himself from smiling, instead he throws at you, rudely:

“Go back to your cubicle, haven't you heard we're struggling with staff? Tune yourself into working as if there were two of you.”

Your eyebrows curve both and amusement and bewilderment. Work for two people? Is this man anything but insane? 

“Of course, I understand how difficult it is to organise all this messy environment, especially when you’re the only hard-working person in the office.”

You shrug artlessly and leave him to his beloved leisure - cigarettes.

Wriothesley

When you barge into the coffee date with Wriothesley, jumping off your motorcycle, the bouquet of flowers he was holding almost escapes from his hand before he catches if just before the flowers crash onto the floor. 

“Wow, new style?” Wriothesley notes, upon seeing your new hairstyle which appears of length not longer than his own now.

“Thanks. Wanted to add some interesting change into life.”

“I hope it’s not my influence.”

“Even if it were, is it that bad?”

“It suits you. You look…” the duke once again runs his eyes up and down the whole you. “Cool. And out of all people, didn't expect you to ride a motorcycle.”

“There is a lot of things to learn about me, Wrio.”

Feeling slightly stressed and awkward Wriothesley finally realises that the bouquet is still in his possession.

“Oh, these are for you. Hope you like them. I’m not very good when it comes to gifts, but flowers, y’know… Ladies like flowers”, he chuckles nervously, “I guess?”

“Let’s take a seat already.”

You take your bouquet of sweetly smelling flowers that consist of primarily red flowers and point your head to the side, where Wriothesley follows to have a hot warming drink with you.

“We always talk about me and I feel so selfish for that. Come on, tell me something about how you live. I really want to know you.” Wriothesley receives the coffee from the waiter and adds, much quieter: “The real you.”

“The outfit I’m wearing today, is the best I could ever come up with. I mean, this style, the way you’re seeing me right now, is just me, (Y/N). I’ve never felt more peaceful than I do now.”

At that, Wriothesley gives you an approving smile, while his eyes seem to look at you with such attention, you know he is studying you every second, every bit of you, and it flatters you.

“You look dangerous. I fight with dangerous every day.”

“Then we might indulge each other just fine.”

Capitano

“We’re going to Snezhnaya. I hope you remembered to change your outfit, because if not that would mean I’m going to need a doctor to save you from the fev-”

Capitano’s words are cut off on their own and his expression from the gloomy and strained becomes surprised and lightly softened.

“Good archons…” he let out, amazed and apparently smitten. You went down the staircase of Capitano’s mansion, your outfit is the sole reason why his head seems messed up right now. He never took into a consideration that you would look so hell of fantastic. Yes, if course he knew you would be pretty wearing furs and thicker layer of clothes, but never had he thought you’d look immensely different!

Capitano stops there, looking at you with his glimmering blue eyes. You come close and shrug. 

“Your tailors have done the impossible, I believe. Never felt more convenient”, you clear your throat and give him a confused look. Utterly unaware of why he’d look like he had just been most seriously shocked or even traumatised, you ask:

“Capitano? Is something wrong?” You look over yourself up and down. “Is it too much? Do you dislike my braids?”

“No. Not in the slightest. I’m just… I-” he lets out a long held breath. “I am positively surprised... But, don't you think that such appearance might cause unnecessary attention?”

Your eyes widen. Capitano is so transparent, you don't even need to figure him out too hard.

“Why would it? Or are you perchance afraid someone is going to steal me from your camp?”

Abruptly, Capitano turns away and mutters something under his breath, though you never see his eyes :

“No. You are not even handsome enough. Don't flatter yourself, woman.”

“Okay”, you shrug, chill and calm. “Whatever you say, Captain.”

Dainsleif

Dainsleif is reading a book in the library when he hears someone enter behind his back. He pays them no attention but as you make your way to the “Abyss” section (which is half forbidden, but who cares) he lowered his book at once.

“Have you not read enough? You can’t binge read this literature so carelessly. It’s very heavy and overwhelming.” He shuts up when you turn to face him, your outfit is less formal than when you usually have to catch up with him.

“Your outfit is overwhelming, too”, he closes his book, puts it away to the windowsill and approaches you straightforwardly. “What have you done to yourself?”

“I happened to overlook some really nice things in my wardrobe. Now they are no longer abandonded. Do you not think them appropriate?” Your expression turns pensive.

“You look gorg- ahem, I think you could dress more plainly in a place like this. After all, it is just an ancient, slowly dissolving library. But you’re dressed like you’re meeting a…. royal.”

“Well you are kind of royal.”

“What?” Dainsleif feigns confusion, though completely aware of what’s it you’re leading to.

“Forget about it, Dain. I’m just gonna take some stuff and disappear as soon as possible. Wouldn't like to annoy you with my unnecessary radiant appearance any longer.”

Seeing you rummage around the books Dainsleif thinks it stupid to simply stand there and be nothing of help. He comes up to the bookcase and clears his throat.

“No, this one should come after this tome. Look, the right order would be…” he takes a purple styled book and places it into your hand, the other, blue one he takes in his and explains. “This appears to be the first tome, the one you’re holding, I mean.”

“It looks nice, doesn't it?”

“Yeah, I know. Very nice.” Says Dainsleif, looking into your eyes, but not at the book.

[nanaimothoughts]

A light-hearted rant

VENGEANCE SAGA SPOILERS

So, I'm pretty active on TikTok. Idk if I've gotten on to some weird side of the EPIC fandom over there, but I've been seeing a weird amount of pearls being clutched over the end of the Vengeance Saga, specifically the last sequence of 600 Strike, and I for one am rather frustrated by it, so now you're gonna hear about it.

On one hand, there's the "It's out of character for Odysseus!!!"

I feel like this take just. Entirely ignores Ody's character development, or the context of 600 Strike. The reason Odysseus resorts to torturing Poseidon is because he's lost everything. Plus being so close to his ultimate goal before confronting the main reason he's lost so much. Of course he's gonna go to the extreme. On top of that, Odysseus has been being pushed closer and closer to taking extreme actions throughout the story (see: Ruthlessness, No Longer You, Monster, The Entire Thunder Saga). This is the natural progression.

The other major point I've seen is "Wouldn't Odysseus be punished for that??"

Simple. This version of Poseidon might be really petty, but it would make absolutely zero sense for him to either retaliate on his own (ex. flooding Ithaca) or go crying to Zeus for Ody doing… what Poseidon wanted him to. Reminder that when Poseidon relents, Odysseus is in the middle of saying "Didn't you say that ruthlessness is mercy upon ourselves?" And second reminder that the first time we hear the "ruthlessness is mercy" mantra, Poseidon says he wants Ody to learn it (But before you go, I need to make you learn how // Ruthlessness is mercy upon ourselves). Odysseus did learn the lesson, and imo it wouldn't make sense story-wise for Poseidon to suddenly turn around like "Well I didn't mean like that"

TL;DR: Actually pay attention to characters before making dumb takes online, or people like me will make unnecessarily long Tumblr posts about how you're wrong <3

[befuddledcinnamonroll]

I've been thinking a lot about expectations this week.

A number of years ago, when I was visiting my brother, he criticized me for not doing something that he expected me to do. It was a frustrating talk because he wasn't at all willing to hear my perspective. But what bothered me the most about it was when I said "you can just ask" and he said "I shouldn't have to".

I was doing everything culturally expected of a good guest, I didn't even know what his extra expectations were, and yet he felt entitled to be mad at me for not automatically knowing them, and not living up to them.

It can be so easy for us to let our expectations get ahead of us, to make assumptions based on our own perspectives, and to then feel let down.

And I feel like I'm seeing a lot of this kind of thing in people's experience with media these days. There seems to be a clash happening between expectations and reality. And people feeling genuinely upset when the reality is not what they wanted.

I'm seeing a lot of complaints and "critiques" that seem to fall in to the category of "this is not how I personally want this to go" or "this doesn't resonate with my personal experience".

To be clear, I'm not saying this in a pointing fingers kind of way, because I have 100% done it myself.

When the trailer for Cutie Pie first came out, I got so excited imagining Kuea as some bad boy living a double life. He was going to be so hard to tame, he was going to put Lian through the wringer, and it was going to be amazing.

What I got was something very different from what I expected, and I struggled with the show.

But it was a really valuable learning moment for me. Because everything in the trailer was in the series. It was my interpretation of it, of those few minutes out of hours of material, my assumptions about the moments not yet shown, that caused me frustration.

That was a turning point in my "let's see where the journey takes us" philosophy. And I have to say, engaging in QL has been a hell of a lot more fun since I learned to let go of what I thought should happen.

I still have critiques of shows, of course I do. Nothing is above criticism. But I don't get so personally affronted now when something doesn't do what I expect. I'm more willing to see where the destination takes us before I decide the journey isn't working.

Of course I am still human, and I still get caught off guard sometimes by expectations I didn't realize I had let slip in.

But I have found my experience immeasurably improved by considering a few things when I'm watching a series:

Am I leading with curiosity, or judgment?

What is happening here culturally? What assumptions am I making based on my own background and country of origin? What happens if I step back and look at the bigger picture of how this culture engages with media? Do I even know, or do I have more to learn?

Is this actually bad... or is it just not for me? Is this just not resonating with me? Is it making me uncomfortable? What can this discomfort tell me about myself? Is it a bad show, or just a show I need to walk away from?

Am I more focused on the story I want told, and not paying enough attention to the story that the creators of the series want to tell? What assumptions am I making about their intent?

Am I only focused on what the value is for me as an individual, and not considering how this may be making other people feel seen or be meeting their needs? Can I acknowledge that there can be inherent value in things that do not give value to me personally?

There is value in critique, but there is also importance in self-reflection and understanding why we are feeling the way that we are, and when our own setting of expectations may be playing a role.

It's funny that in some ways this seems to be a reflection of what a golden age of QL we are living in - there are so many options, and time is so scarce, that I can see why people are frustrated when they feel like a show is not living up to what they wanted.

But as someone who has lived multiple decades without this kind of media, and only relatively recently having been able to experience it...there is a lot more to be gained by reveling in what you are loving than over what you are hating.

[cyle]

Hi! I'm wondering if you can offer any insight into something that's been bugging me with all of the changes. This is genuinely not a hostile ask - I know first-hand how hard (necessary) change management is. I don't envy the position y'all are in.

That being said - I'm having a hard time making sense of the strategy around the roll out for the last few big changes/"experiments"). It seems like the folks doing the messaging vs the actual feature management are not on the same page.

It has been stated several times that:

"We’ll be testing [our new] ideas in an opt-in basis with people who’ve been using Tumblr for years, and more especially with people who’ve never even heard of Tumblr (a difficult group to find)."

We've also seen, repeatedly, that

"Tumblr is a place where you can tailor and customize your experience to individual preferences."

With those statements in mind, the choice to roll these new features out to folks who *didn't* volunteer - and not offer any way to "customize our experience" seems like a strange one.

An expectation (which was positive) was established only to be directly violated within a few weeks. It makes it challenging to get a read on what y'all actually mean -- and to extend good faith or trust when communications do come out.

If you say you're going to do something, then do it, it builds trust. If you don't, it erodes trust. And that just makes your already difficult jobs harder - and the userbase even more reactive and knee-jerk resistant.

Can you give us a sense of what's going on here? Or can you at least pass this feedback on to whoever is handling the messaging around this stuff? We can see that y'all are striving for transparency, but that's only effective if it's honest/consistent.

[TL;DR: Tumblr's messaging emphasizes testing changes with volunteers, and offering the ability to customize - but that doesn't seem to be what's actually happening. What's up?]

this is a really great question, thank you for asking it. you've accurately pointed out some glaring holes in our communication strategy -- some of that is even my fault, to be honest, as someone who tries to help shape our public communications.

the easiest answer is that there's a lot of work happening on the internal tumblr side, and not all of it is the same kind of work, and therefore not all of it is being communicated consistently. that's a huge problem if you're not inside of it, as you point out; the contradictions seem weird for anyone paying attention.

i'm currently a part of the @labs group and we're trying to come up with radical ideas for reshaping tumblr, prototype them quickly, show them to people, and iterate on them, and reject them quickly if they don't make sense. the Tumblr Mini thing recently is an unfortunate example of that -- something leaked way too early, before we even got a chance to really understand how the thing we prototyped would be received. that may never go beyond the thing people saw, for good reason: it doesn't make sense. we're learning from it, but it's unfinished.

in that Labs group, we do want volunteer-based feedback, and we're actually starting that very soon with targeted user research. you may see some surveys soliciting that feedback soon, or invites to be a part of the testing. i'm extremely excited by that, because some other ideas we have feel like they should've been a part of tumblr since the beginning.

but.......

there's a whole different group at tumblr that are making "core product" improvements, and a lot of their work is reflected in the recent staff post about product strategy. their aim is to alleviate a lot of common points of confusion and frustration, some of which will seem counter-intuitive to people who have been on tumblr for many years and learned (what i call) "the hard way".

a lot of that core improvement work will be rolled out, experimented with, and iterated on, the traditional way: involuntary A/B tests, rather than volunteers. that is standard industry practice, because when you're trying to understand the behavior of millions of people, just asking for volunteers introduces too much selection bias.

however, it's important to note that even today's rollout of the new desktop navigation was released to some XKit devs beforehand, so we could get early feedback. so sometimes we do roll these core things out for feedback first, before "regular users", before we A/B test it. usually those small initial experiments are hyper-targeted though... in this case, because we do actually care about XKit and third party developers. you don't see that though!

so full transparency: not everything we do is going to be volunteer-based, not everything we do can be communicated adequately before we test it, not everything during testing will be customizable, because how much we want to customize is dependent on the outcome of these tests. it's a bit of a chicken-and-egg problem.

and furthermore, this is kind of how it's always been, for better or worse, since around 2016 when tumblr started believing in A/B tests and experiments, rather than just "ship it and we'll see"... the common denominator, though, is that we want your feedback. we don't do a good enough job soliciting that feedback, but we do want it. (i kinda wish we had an easy feedback button for the new layout.) we do make decisions based on feedback, but we augment that decision-making process with hard data from experiments.

i hope that makes sense? there's too much to cover to provide you with the full context. i could write a book about it. all i can confidently say is that we're trying as best as we can to balance the ideas of keeping tumblr special and unique, while trying weird/bad/good/uncomfortable new directions to help the platform grow and thrive. status quo and complacency aren't acceptable; tumblr needs to change to survive. i am just as uncomfortable and upset by that fact as anyone, and i worry every day and night about it, whether the price of survival is worth it.

we'll see, hopefully together.

[dreamlifebunny]

hello bunny! I (ego, probably) find stay 'knowing myself' throughout the day as I tell myself I will observe the Ego's life with no attachment but in 2 minutes get swept up in my thoughts and identifying with them.

How do I separate my Self from ego and stop identifying with ego? and How do I believe that I am Self, 'I' need some proof, what do I do to get that? I'm so sorry if this has already been answered or repetitive.

hiiii, anon! c: no need to apologize at all, i completely understand the question and the struggle! this is a long answer, sorry it's late here and i have no idea how to be concise ever lol.

the biggest piece of advice i would give to you is to not beat yourself up for getting swept up in the thoughts. when we get swept away we can get frustrated with ourselves because we're like, "ughh i'm not doing this right, i have to start over, c'mon ego just do it correctly already!!" but the thing is, that is just how the ego is. it is acting the exact way it was intended to; the ego has endless thoughts, the ego worries, and the ego wants to beat you up for not getting it "right." but Self knows that that is the way the ego is and doesn't try to fight it! It accepts the ego as it is and simply lets it be. Self thinks that the ego is perfect simply because it "is;" it's perfect when its happy, it's perfect when it's sad, it's perfect when it has a thousand thoughts, it's perfect when it feels angry at itself. the ego/character you're playing right now, your Self created, and it is perfectly neutral and loving towards it ALL.

i used to be so confused when people would say, "just observe," because when i had thoughts i didn't like i would feel negatively and try to push the negative thought away or try to stop feeling the negative feeling. but what i learned was that instead of trying to change the thoughts, i can notice that i'm trying to change the thoughts. i can notice that i felt uncomfortable, then i can notice that the thought is sticking around, then i can notice that the feeling gets harder, then i can notice where the feeling is in my body, then i can notice that my awareness of where it is in my body has made me forget that i had a negative thought that i didn't like in the first place! it all falls away, because simply noticing helps you shift your awareness.

as ego, you will never run out of things to notice. that's why there are so many opportunities to practice not identifying with the ego! something you could try practicing for it to become more normal is taking time throughout your day to sit with yourself and truly pay attention, neutrally, to every single thought, feeling, and sensation that comes up. when i say neutrally, i don't mean NOT feeling negatively about things you're frustrated with or pushing down the feelings. the ego is going to feel frustrated, because that's how the ego feels. what i mean is, even if you get frustrated with yourself, NOTICE THAT TOO. "oh, i'm noticing that i'm feeling frustrated. that's okay!" it's all okay - have compassion and love towards EVERY feeling and thought that comes up, because they are all a creation of Self/God. i'll give you an example of the first time that i "got" it that will hopefully explain what i'm saying a little more. this was something close to my internal monologue:

alright. here we go. gonna notice some stuff as Self. i'm noticing my breathing. cool!

i'm noticing that i'm noticing my breathing now hehe. that's okay!

i'm noticing a feeling come up; ego wants to laugh because this feels funny to notice. that's okay!

i'm noticing that the feeling feels really warm in my body, it's pleasant. that's okay!

i'm noticing that i'm pretty hungry right now, actually... that's okay!

*drifts for a little while bcuz i was so hungry*

oh. i noticed that i just started drifting thinking about lunch. that's okay... wait, is that okay?

shit. i fucked up and drifted, ugh. that's not okay, why do i always drift so easily? *gets frustrated with myself*

wait, i didn't fuck up. i'm noticing that i was just frustrated with myself. okay. frustration, you are noticed. it's okay for the ego to be frustrated! that's okay!

i'm noticing now the peace that comes with simply allowing my ego to be the way it is. that's okay!

i'm noticing that i'm thinking about lunch again. that's okay!

maybe i should eat. what should i eat? (*drifting*)

ugh! i keep messing this up! (*frustrated*)

oh! i am noticing that the frustration is coming again, and i'm also noticing that i'm hungry. that's a sensation the ego is having. i am noticing it. that's okay!

does this make sense? everything that the ego does is perfect, it's acting as the way it always is - we as Self are simply here to observe it! it doesn't have to change its ways for you to become self-actualized; in fact, the ego cannot "become enlightened," the feeling of "enlightenment" only happens when the ego is left to just vibe and do its thing, without changing it. the ego is perfect to Self because no matter what, it is playing its role exactly as it was meant to. the ego wants to fight itself, but it doesn't need to fight itself, because it's doing exactly what it was designed to do. Self knows this! Self is able to take a step back and allow the yuckiness that the ego feels to just happen, because it knows that that yuckiness is a creation of Self. this is why people always say that Self is an expression of / feeling of pure love, because everything that the ego does is simply okay, it's allowed, it's perfect, it's loved by Self. it's pure acceptance, and what is more loving than that? i think it's also why people who are Christian say that "God's creations are perfect" because they were created by "Him" and "He makes no mistakes." it's the same thing with our true Selves and ego - the ego is a perfect creation of the Self, it doesn't need to beat itself up or get frustrated because it's not doing things properly. but if it does beat itself up or get frustrated, all you as Self have to do is say, "it's okay. i'm noticing you're frustrated. i'm observing this frustration. that's allowed, you're okay, you're perfect!"

you don't have to say "that's okay" every time you have a thought or sensation, either. i told myself the phrase "nothing i am conscious of is me" when i was trying this out. sometimes i tell myself, "that's allowed." sometimes i just notice and shift awareness without thinking anything and just witness. do whatever feels natural to you, that's what this whole process is about!

it might take time for you to get to this space where it feels constant. but that is okay! the biggest thing to remember with all of this is that it is all okay. you as the ego aren't doing anything wrong, you just need to observe when you do feel that you're doing something wrong and return to that lovely observing Self who knows everything is accepted.

another thing to keep in mind is that this might take practice, but it doesn't have to be an arduous journey. you know how starting a new habit can take a little bit of time before it becomes natural, and then all of a sudden you're remembering to take your meds at the same time every day or your posture is improved because you've reminded yourself enough times throughout the day? it's the same thing for detachment (or at least has been in my case). practice makes better, and holy fuck, we've gone our whole lives attached and identified with ego, so cut yourself some slack! <3 just take some time to return to your Self throughout the day, whether that's taking five minutes to practice the above "noticing" or even just noticing whenever you remember you're Self. whenever i suddenly realize i'm getting caught up in ego identification (which is quite often), i try not to beat myself up - have compassion for the sweet character you've known and identified with! they don't know any better. sometimes i greet my ego like an old friend, like "oh! hi ego! i'm noticing you now."

hopefully this makes sense - compassion and witnessing is the key, and truly with practice you'll come to find it's the simplest thing you've ever known to do. you've got this! <3

also, here is advice from this lovely anon, too!

[love-toxin]

ellie we literally can't talk abt pokemon without talking about miss rika,, i love her

OK BUT IM GLAD U SAID SMTHN CAUSE I'M OBSESSED LOWKEY.. .......WHO GAVE HER THE RIGHT TO LOOK THIS GOOD......

Like. Effortlessly cool. Canon nickname-giver. I was going buckwild during her battle and I'm not even sorry about it. I could NOT stop thinking very unwholesome thoughts during her interview segment either......like......you can't put a woman in a suit at a desk across from me and not expect me to lose my damn MIND!!! I wanna piss her off just so she makes me pay for it, and dearly. I'M GONNA GO OFF UNDER THIS CUT AND I CANNOT BE STOPPED!!!

Bear with me on this train of thought here: imagine being a repeat challenger of the Championship Challenge. Your pokemon aren't bad (you don't think, anyways) and you've trained for hours and days on end to try and beat the Elite League, to the point of even begging the gym leaders for rematches to try and improve your skill or pick up some tip you didn't notice before. But without fail, every single time you try, you never end up getting past Rika--the first of the Elite Four, the easiest one to beat, is somehow so hard of a challenge that you stay awake at night wracking your brain for some strategy to beat her. Even worse is that you're older than half the kids that challenge the whole circuit, and you hate the feeling of all these ten year olds beating out your grown adult ass as they fly by each challenge while you're left crawling.

You can't just build a whole new team to counter her alone, or else you'll just get crushed by the others. You can't build a new team period unless you wanna put off claiming that Champion title until you're geriatric, so you're kinda screwed from both angles. And the worst part? The main reason why you keep failing is because every time you get a new strategy--have your pokemon learn new moves, train them up, swap out one pokemon for another--she somehow one ups you the next time you go to challenge her again. Like she has some kind of insane bug planted in your cellphone or something where she can hear everything you say, because how in the world does she keep coming up with new counters every time you try? Sometimes she even has new pokemon altogether, which from the accounts of other people who have tried it, is almost unheard of for the Elite Four to switch up their teams so often. Or at all!

The answer comes when you finally hit a wall. You're sure you've come up with the best counter to her moves, that your pokemon are all well-equipped to withstand whatever she decides to throw at you this time--and despite all that, you lose again. Badly, this time.

So for the first time, you ask her outright. How do you keep beating me? And although she puts on that lazy tone as she chuckles back "You just aren't paying enough attention, sweetheart" when she's met with a cold stare, her lips finally seem to loosen as she flashes you a smirk.

She admits that she likes watching you squirm. She saw that look on your face the first time--the only time she's legitimately beat you--and she couldn't believe how satisfying it was. Maybe she just doesn't best nearly as many trainers as her tougher counterparts, but something about the slump of your particular shoulders and the pout on your perfect lips is the reason why she refuses to budge and let you slip by. Really, it's not as sinister of a reason that you expected--she just made very careful decisions about each change she made, and followed your trail of logic to make sure she stayed one step ahead of you, and you in particular. In fact, there's probably been more people than ever that have gotten past her since she first battled you, since she's paid all her attention to blocking you alone. And as shocking as it is to hear her freely admit that, you still have some residual frustration from being bested again that you can only work up the smallest, crudest words as an answer.

"You're mean." You huff, pouting once more and shoving your arms across your chest. You'd stomp your foot if you didn't know she'd tease you for it, cause you'd look like even more of a petulant child than you already do, but you really are that mad. Isn't that against League rules, or something?!

"Poor baby...I'd feel worse if you didn't look so cute, honestly. My bad, bunny." Nooooo, no, you can not fold under that cheesy smile and the softness twinging that nickname. She will not, you repeat, not use those charming good looks and that undeniable tension you've felt between you two to seduce you....even though you've kinda dreamed of that. You didn't exactly spend all those restless nights just thinking about her battling style, after all...."You want Rika to make you feel better, honey bunny?"

You're not even sure how she got so close, how her hand is on your arm now, stroking her leather-clad fingers up and down your skin while she maneuvers herself to slide in behind you. She's still gentle, careful, touch light enough that you could brush it off if you wanted--but you instead find yourself slowly leaning into it, nuzzling into her lips as she presses kisses to your temple and coos at your sweetness, how you feel so soft and warm against her. Angelic, more like, you're as precious as an angel aren't you? You hate that you squirm at that compliment, looking up towards the ceiling to try and wipe that giddy, small smile that's creeping across your lips away. It doesn't hold though, you can't keep the charade up forever--eventually you're wiggling a little more into her, teasing at the possibility of her getting a little more unprofessional than she already has been in secret. And finally, you get what you want out of it. You get her low, smooth voice in your ear, a slight rasp to her last few words as she grips your hips hard enough to hear the leather stretch.

"I'll take my gloves off for this 'match', kay? And let's find somewhere a little more private....I think you'll enjoy it more if you can go all out, honey."

[deoidesign]

Two things

Any tips for line work?

Any tips for drawing eyes?

You’ve got a killer style for that and I struggle for things like that, so was wondering what you do for that and have any advice for a young artist? Also Steve is gender goals and me and him have the same haircut which makes me happy. Comics with an older queer character are nice, makes me happy to see someone like me get to get older like that :]

This ended up really long, sorry...

"Style" is really just an amalgamation of every decision an artist makes. When you're starting to learn, your brain is processing a LOT on the technical and fundamental side. In time, these will become tools for you to use as you please.

Your style is in you already, I assure you. It's the clothes you love, your favorite color, the season that makes you comfy... Art is a form of communication, and the first person you have to learn to communicate with is yourself. It's a lifelong process of growth, self love, and personal expression. It's nothing to rush!

these are from 2011, 2016, and 2023!

(13, 18, and 25 years old)

You can see how my skills have evolved, but my tastes are rather much the same. I've still got an absolute ton to learn.

When it comes to lineart, if you find yourself regularly struggling with "losing energy from the sketch", then making your lineart thicker might be a solution; thicker lines are a lot more forgiving!

This is a common issue many artists struggle with. It happens because the sketch has multiple lines, so the brain gets to choose which one it likes most. When you do lineart that choice isn't up to the brain, so it's not tricking itself to seeing all its favorite lines anymore.

Lineart can also help you define depth. Generally speaking, thicker lines tend to be on closer objects, and further away objects have thinner lines. You'll also lose more and more detail (and sometimes edges) the further away an object gets.

It can also define light in your lines. solid blacks can block out entire sections of shadow. Another option is hatching, and another is stippling. It doesn't have to define light, though, many styles define their light through various other shading methods.

My biggest tip for lineart is to practice "line confidence." fill a sketchbook page with lines that span the entire length of the page, evenly distanced, as straight as you can, without lifting the pen. Do this every day. Fill a page with ellipses, fill a page with circles. Do this every day. Eventually, you'll learn to 1: draw with your entire arm, which will save you a lot of quite literal pain in the future, and 2: you'll be able to draw the right line the first time more often, which will save you time and frustration!

I didn't have an example offhand so I did this to show what I mean, but I highly suggest doing this on paper in ink and not on the computer, if you can.

When it comes to eyes, definitely look lots to real people, and also pay attention to how artists stylize them! There's generally 4 main things to keep in mind:

1: the top lid. This one is major for defining the expression, so it changes a lot depending on context.

2: the bottom lid! this one doesn't move nearly as much.

Each lid has a vertex, and changing where the relative high and low points are on them between characters can change a lot about what the eyes are saying.

3: the sclera (whites of the eyes), iris (color of the eyes), and pupil (the hole we see out of)! These change an absolute TON based on style.

4: the eyelid!

and here's me just moving each of the elements around! it changes a lot about what the eye is saying as you change each element, play around with them! try not to always go with your first choices.

There's a lot more to eyes than this, and a lot more to lineart as well... but I hope this is something of a starting point! Getting better about art is about learning to think and study everything you see. I genuinely see the world differently than I did 10 years ago, and I'm much happier for it (and a much better artist!)

And when it comes to writing stories about queer characters who get to be older and still happy, I hope to someday see you making stories that bring someone the same sense of comfort you had reading my work. I hope it someday becomes normalized, mundane even. And I know it starts with people like you deciding it's important! We're here, we've always been here, and we're not going anywhere.

Best of luck on your artistic journey, I wish you a long lifetime of growing closer to yourself through your art.

[unreliablesnake]

You must be new here (Joel Miller x reader)

Summary: You've heard a lot about Joel before he showed up in Jackson, but now it's time to meet him in person.

Note: (ex)popstar!reader. This is a short something. Take it as a test drive. If people like it, I think I'll continue this. / If you want to know when I post new stuff, follow @unreliablesnakefics and hit the get notifications button. I don't have a taglist. / It's late so I'm taking full responsibility for typos and mistakes since I didn't proofread it.

“You’re new,” you told the unfamiliar guy in the Tipsy Bison once you got off the small stage in the back and sat on a barstool next to him. You waited for him to say something, but he remained silent, and instead of paying attention to the conversation, he watched his glass as if there was something in it. “My name is–”

“I know who you are,” he suddenly interrupted you grumpily.

By now you knew who he was. Tommy had told you about him way before he got here with the girl, and now that they were here to stay, you thought it would be best if you introduced yourself first. He didn’t know anyone apart from his brother and sister-in-law, maybe having a friend would do wonders with his integration into this community.

You didn't find his tone of voice offensive, not after what you had heard about him. He was like this, and not just with you. But you didn’t give up, so instead of leaving him alone, you ordered two glasses of whiskey and kept watching him to make sure he wouldn’t sneak away while you weren’t looking.

“How do you like Jackson so far?” you asked, immediately regretting this trivial question. “You know what? Never mind. But tell me this. Do you even try to make friends here? Or are you planning on staying a loner?”

“You’re used to being liked by people, aren’t you? Not everyone’s out there to win a popularity contest, sweetheart,” he informed you before finishing his drink.

“You’ll learn that people here are nice to each other. The sooner you accept that and act nice, the better it’s going to get for you,” you explained with a smile. “The girl you came here with gets along with others quite nicely. Follow her example.”

After taking a deep breath, Joel reached for the drink you had ordered for him. “Ellie. Her name is Ellie.” You nodded, taking a mental note to remember it. “Why are you trying so hard to keep up this conversation?” he suddenly asked you.

It was a good question, you had to admit that. “I remember you from before the outbreak,” you told him.

“We haven’t met before.”

“But I met your daughter, didn’t I? At a signing event,” you specified, the corners of your lips curling into a smile when you saw the taken aback expression on his face. When he opened his mouth to say something, you shrugged and said, “It’s hard to forget a teenage girl who’s mortified by her father’s comments.”

“But how do you know that was me? I’m sure you met a lot of people before the outbreak, you can’t remember everyone.”

“Tommy told me about you, your daughter, and this little encounter of ours. It jump started my memory. I know she was a fan. I also know that you took her to one of my concerts in Austin.”

Joel mumbled something under his breath as he shook his head. If you had to guess, you would have said he swore to talk to his little brother about the importance of boundaries. You found it entertaining, so while you knew it was rude, you still let out a chuckle. He gave you a strange look at this which made you bite on your lower lip and focus your attention on your drink.

After a longer period of silence, you felt him staring at you. You had been avoiding his gaze for a while, but now that he was looking at you like that, as if he was judging you, it was getting frustrating. “What is it?” you asked him.

“Nothing.”

But he kept watching you with an intrigued look on his face. Gulping, you tried to focus on something else. Anything, really, but nothing worked. Your mind kept returning to him, trying to figure out what was going on in his head while he was looking at you like this.

Like he would like to devour you.

Although you might have been imagining things. Maybe he wasn’t looking at you because he found you that interesting, maybe he just wanted to get you to leave. So you cleared your throat, then stood up and flashed a friendly smile at him. “Well, I’ll call it a day. It was nice to meet you, Joel.”

Nodding, he raised his glass as a form of farewell. Joel would have never admitted it, but he liked you. Well, he liked your image before the outbreak. You had been around thirty at the time, being one of the most famous pop stars in the world, with millions of fans from kids to grown-ass adults. He wasn’t a fan of your music, but he sure appreciated all the things you did for the people in need.

And now that he met you in person, he hated to admit that you seemed genuinely nice. You actually cared about him, you truly wanted him to be a part of this community. He wondered what Tommy had told you before he showed up, how much he changed some stories to meet a narrative about a nice, caring brother, something he hadn’t been in a very, very long time.

Well, there was only one way to find out.

[twoidiotwriters1]

Daughter of Olympus (Leo Valdez xFem!Oc)

A/N: Hold tight guys we're getting some turbulence -Danny Words: 1,812 Series' Masterlist Previous Chapter / Next Chapter Listen to: 'Running Up That Hill' -by Kate Bush

XLI: Source(s): Dude, Trust Me

A whole day goes by and Hades is nowhere to be seen, but I've made up my mind that I won't care anymore. I've fought and killed monsters, but it isn't enough.

"I feel like we should've told someone about this..." Lily mutters.

"Jake's helping us, we're fine."

"Ara..."

"What?" I snap at her impatiently.

Lily's worried, I'm not as giddy and positive as when the fight started, so she thinks I might do something reckless. But it's not like I'm announcing our impending deaths, it isn't that kind of change. I have a fierce disposition to keep going no matter the outcome.

Which of course, could be seen as "being reckless".

You see, an hour ago we found my parents in their Prius, right in front of where we'd fought that day. Percy almost lost it, it was the second time I had to absorb half of someone's breakdown in less than two days, so I'm pretty tired, but I refuse to take a break.

"I'm just making sure..." Lily pauses. "That you have the remotes to these things."

I point at the dino bag hanging on my shoulder. "'Course. C'mon, before Percy realizes I left."

I burst into tears pretty often, but I have an advantage over demigods like Percy and Lily: I process feelings faster. Right now it's like I'm in the zone, with all these people feeling all kinds of ways, I have the clearest mind.

Mom's right, feelings give me power.

We go back to the camping site where Percy's already looking for me, and he's angry.

He pulls me away from Lily. "Let's talk."

Everyone throws curious looks at us, Percy's never harsh with me, not even when we're training together.

"You're pinching me!" I whine.

Percy stops and stares at me, his eyes are like Greek fire. "What did you do?"

"I-I just went to place some bombs—"

"Not today," he interrupts me. "The other night—Jake said you disappeared for a whole hour. Spit it out."

"...I'm helping you win the war," my voice gets quiet.

"What did you do?"

"Judging by how you're acting, I think you know."

Percy's hands go to his hair as he turns away from me, his face red. This feels like being scolded by my dad. "You made a deal with Hades?" He asks in an angry whisper, turning back to face me. "What were you thinking?!"

I don't ask how he knows. Maybe he saw it in a dream. "He's been insulted, Percy. He doesn't want to help you, and we need him."

"You're stupid," he says like he's just realizing this now. "Mr. D told me..."

"What?"

"He asked me to tell you," Percy scowls. "That he wants to be considered too."

I can't hide the excitement in me. "I'm listening."

He grimaces at my reaction. "He said that having madness on your side is useful too."

"Will you look at that," I mumble, my gaze drifting as I take in the news. "The gods really are paying attention to me..."

"Ara," he grabs my shoulders. "Stop. Whatever you're doing, it's a bad idea."

"No."

"Didn't you learn anything from—?"

"The prophecy says you have to die," I state bitterly. "I heard Jake and Will talking about it," I push his hands away from my body. "You're not dying if I can help it."

"They don't know anything!" He says in frustration.

"It doesn't matter, this isn't about just you, I promised Mike I would do this," I press, my voice cracking when I pronounce my friend's name. "I've made up my mind."

"What did you promise?" He demands. "What are you doing, Ara?"

"I'm bettering myself." 

Before our argument escalates, a roar and several short explosions reach us from the street I just arrived from. Percy's brows knit together. "That's my dream..."

"And those were my bombs," I point out. "Hopefully, we just killed a few dozen there."

He moves me to the side, urging me to safety.

"Take cover, Ara. They're bringing a Drakon."

Ara's standing in the middle of a field, and she doesn't know how she got there. She looks around anxiously, and for a moment fears she's been taken just like her brother, but then she hears his voice.

"Cyclopes. Centaurs. This is wrong. All wrong..."

Percy. She's found her brother!

"We need to get him back to the boat," a new voice utters. Ara realizes Percy's not alone, two kids are with him, a boy and a girl. "The sea will make him feel better."

"No argument," the unknown boy says. "There are too many of them. The camp... we have to warn the camp."

"They know," Percy whimpers. "Reyna knows."

Ara rushes to meet him and then freezes in her place. An army of monsters is passing by downhill, ahead of them. 

Ara concludes that she's dreaming a horrifying, but long-awaited demigod dream.

"The camp, yes. Vengeance!" Ara takes a moment to confirm, but it really is Ma Gasket in the crowd of monsters. "The orange and purple ones destroyed my home. Now Ma Gasket will destroy theirs! Do you hear me, Leo? Jason? Piper? I come to annihilate you! I will kill you, Arae Jackson!"

"Jason!" The girl next to Percy gasps, she's wearing a purple shirt, and Percy is too. "She fought Jason. He might still be alive!"

"Do those other names mean anything to you?" The unknown boy asks.

"I..." Percy closes his eyes. Suddenly he breathes in harshly, like someone punched him in the gut. "My sister!"

When the Ares cabin arrives, something feels off. Clarisse is glowing pink. I've seen Clarisse's soul light before, and hers is purple. 

Silena's was pink.

I feel dizzy once I understand what's happening. "That's not Clarisse."

The drakon attacks my sister, and Clarisse and Chris arrive soon after. I run towards them, if someone calls after me I can't hear it, everyone's screaming either way. The drakon doesn't see me, I'm nothing to this creature. 

When I reach Silena I fall to my knees crying. Clarisse leaves her side for just a moment, kills the drakon, and comes back. We carefully take the helmet off my sister's head and she confesses to being the spy.

She dies a hero anyway. Did what she had to, to make up for her wrongdoing. There is nothing else to say. 

It's lucky I wasn't given Pandora's box, cause this is my lowest moment, when I finally lost my girlhood. "Get up," I command Clarisse. "You'll help me fix this."

The older girl picks up a sword and a javelin. I grab Almighty but waver, something stops me this time, it feels like the wrong option. Instead, I search through my dino bag and pull the little square panel that controls the traps and bombs we've left scattered around the site. 

I climb into Clarisse's chariot. "Go that way," I point to the left.

"On it," she growls.

I use charmspeak to make sure the monsters follow us. Once we have them all in the alley, Clarisse makes the chariot fly over their heads and I press the square buttons, blowing up every creature below.

We get rid of 60% of the enemies that way. The 40% left is taken by the centaurs, the hunters, and some Ares campers. Only 10% manage to escape us, or at least that's what Lily tells me once I leave Clarisse so I can tend to the wounded.

Clarisse glows red by the time I leave her. I glow pink. Mom's sending a message: This is what an Aphrodite brings to the table, how we win wars.

I run into Pollux as he walks out of the Empire State. "Hey, man," I smile. "You look tough with that cast. How ya feeling?"

"Like a million bucks," he replies sarcastically.

"That's great dude, 'cause I need you."

He raises a brow. "Percy says I'm in no condition to keep fighting, he wanted me to go back to camp."

I try not to look annoyed. Percy knows Mr. D wants me to use Pollux, why is he trying to take him away from me? "I don't want you to fight," I respond. "You got your daddy's mad powers, right?"

"Yeah?"

"Can you make monsters have some kind of shared hallucination?"

He seems to like where this is going. "I can try."

"Good," I draw out Almighty. "That's all I can do too."

The semester ended faster than Ara thought possible. She's worked hard to keep her mind busy, but now that June has arrived, she's having palpitations.

After she told Annabeth about her dream, the older girl managed to hold some kind of dream communication with Percy thanks to the Hypnos cabin, and that seemed to jumpstart a domino effect of sorts, cause now all Ara sees in her dreams are Percy's bizarre adventures with the horse girl and the archer.

It isn't promising, every dream shows Percy in a different location, and she tries to assist Tyson so he finds their brother, but he isn't fast enough.

When Jason finally gets all of his memories back, he goes to Ara. "What's the name of that Hades kid you're friends with?" It's the first thing he asks.

Ara looks up from the control board of the ship, she's making sure everything works as it's supposed to. "Nico Di Angelo? He's not—"

"Him," Jason interrupts her. "Last September, he visited my camp."

Ara pauses, thinking she heard wrong. "What?"

"Nico Di Angelo," Jason says. "He came to us, and he wasn't alone. He brought his sister to live with us."

The girl's heart skips a bit. "Bianca?"

I don't have a hard time convincing Annabeth to let us use her Yankees cap, I don't even have to use charmspeak on her! Lily's waiting for me with Michael's bow and backpack, and a few trick arrows I made for her. She gives me a bedsheet that I wrap around me as a cape, and a large javelin.

I give Pollux Annabeth's cap. "Stay behind me and Lily at all times."

"You got it."

I whistle (meaning I use a whistle, I can't whistle on my own, remember?) and Blackjack comes down to help me. We just need him to make an entrance, but the amount of sugar cubes I had to promise so he wouldn't rat us out to Percy is outrageous.

"What are we doing, Ara?" Lily asks me, watching as I climb on top of the Pegasus.

"I'm playing dress up," I reply. "If you don't wanna, I can always ask someone else to be my right hand—"

"That's not an option." Her expression hardens, she reaches back and grabs an arrow from her quiver.

I gallop confidently into battle, Lily following right after. Behind me, I hear Pollux whispering in ancient Greek something about blurry thoughts and bending realities.

"Stand down!" I shout at the enemy. "Or I'll kill you all!"

Chiron makes a face like I personally stabbed him in the back. Everyone else starts to yell at me to retreat, but I don't go anywhere that it's not forward. 

If the monsters hadn't been tricked by Pollux, they would've killed me right away, but they were, and it's scared them to death for a good reason: 

The people they see standing between them and the Camp Half-blood army, are Achilles and Odysseus.

Next Chapter ->

Taglist.

@siriuslysirius1107 @ask-giggles1303 @ash-the-hoarder @im-planning-something-look @bandshirts-andbooks @coolninjapaper @thewaterlily @whenisthefall @1randomcomic @you-bloody-shank @sunflowergraves @owlalex44 @taylordaughter @typicalsolangelolover @writingmia @espressopatronum454 @slytherinnqueen @orbitingpolaris @obxstiles

[tumblezwei]

I'm glad to see your enjoying HSR, I love Genshin but Honkai has always been way been more effective at being cohesive at utilizing its MCs and storybeats. I've always had an issue with how despite the game giving you the option to choose Lumine or Aether as the MC its apparent that all the supplementary content for the game and everything else has Aether preset as the default MC compare this to HSR where it feels the same regardless of which MF you choose and only thing that's different is slight gameplay adjustments really and some other small details. But you can tell the devs really tried to make them both different. Idk but I can't help but feel this way

Yeah I definitely agree lmao

I do remember seeing a lot of frustration at how Lumine is almost completely ignored in the game's marketing and side content. But I also think that in general the Trailblazer has been given more of a character than the Traveler. Aside from having a voice, they interact with their environment in unique ways that aren't always up to player choice, they're dialogue is consistently either helpful or fucking weird, and the story has already taken more strides setting them up as an Important Character with Mysterious Circumstances than Genshin ever did with the Traveler in my time playing.

And now I'm gonna talk more bc you opened the flood gates

With Genshin my main problem was always the presentation of it's story. Like, I've seen the lore videos, I've seen the theories and the backstories and the pretty 2D cutscenes, but imo the presence of deep lore doesn't constitute a well written narrative. If the way I'm learning all of this story is through walls of unvoiced dialogue where two characters stand opposite of one another, or through missable collectables, or through timed events that I missed or didn't know were important, then I'm not gonna have a good time lol.

I get so annoyed when I see people saying "Genshin's story is actually good if you pay attention." Like, sorry I'm on my hundredth dialogue box with this nobody NPC who's been running in circles explaining some conflict that I got the gist of 20 sentences ago and I started skipping through.

And while HSR has some of those same issues, they're not as pervasive and spliced up between far greater chunks of genuinely good story and character building. The dialogue is quicker, flows naturally, and almost always voiced (and voiced incredibly well). The quests feel tighter, and the story definitely feels more focused. Every character we meet (sans like, Pela, lmao) are solid, well-defined, and contribute the story that they're in in a meaningful way. Every character feels like they exist for a reason within the story and not just to pad out the roster.

Now, to be fair, I have only just finished Belabog, so my opinion may change in the next segment or it may even change as the game gets more story updates and I'm left disappointment. I actually have no doubts that as the story progresses we're gonna get more fluff characters that don't really add anything because above anything else, a gacha's gonna gacha. But I hope at least I'll still be able to enjoy the story we're getting bc I genuinely think it's great.

Also, if you like Genshin and disagree with everything I said that's fine lol. You enjoy your thing, I'm not gonna stop you.

[highfantasy-soul]

Something that's frustrating me about theories around The Acolyte is that so many are bound and determined that the witches, specifically Korril, are EEEEEVVIIIILLLLLL!!!

It just smacks of 'strong willed woman who wants to protect her people and has the power to do it' = BAD!! She's RIGHT that kids, by 8 years old, should face consequences for putting themselves and others in danger by breaking the rules. The most 'consequence' she lays out is that the girls don't get dessert in the middle of the day...like, really? That's hinting that she's 'evil' to you? She reprimands Osha for not paying attention during the lesson and hiding behind her sister instead of trying to block the force push. It's not like they were demanding Osha hurt someone with the Force and she refused and they got angry at her - it was literally a self-defense technique they wanted her to learn and her 'reprimand' was a curt "I expect better from you."

Invaders break into their home and purposely interrupt a religious ceremony then threaten them about having children there - even though they have no jurisdiction on Brendok - and Korril stands up for her people and demands they leave. That's not some 'evil' thing to do - all y'all who pretend to be rebels who would stand against fascism and defend your family from colonizers sure are changing your tune when a woman is doing exactly that against your blorbos.

Idk, maybe the story will go in the way of Korril being the sith, for some reason poisoning all the other witches (though I genuinely don't see how that logic tracks (of course we don't know a lot of info, so it might in the end)), and she's the one on the killing spree against the jedi - but the quick jump to that conclusion so many people are making is kinda rubbing me the wrong way.

I haven't seen any of Korril's actions so far to be even slightly evil, so to me, that leap to her villainy as a theory is based more on misogyny and distrust of those who have different spiritual practices than 'the norm'. Quite literally demonizing the 'other'/more masculine women and reading every action of theirs, no matter how mundane, as evil in intention.

Sol is the one who demanded to test both children even though Mae clearly didn't want to, Sol is the one who separated Osha from her family to influence her into saying she wanted to join the jedi (yes, separating kids from their abusers to make sure you get them out of that situation if they need it is a thing, but Osha wasn't being abused, Sol and the jedi were just trying to lure her away so they could get her to join their organization), and Sol is the one who lied to Osha about something big that 'he needs to tell her when they get back on the ship'.

So why do I not see anyone jumping to the conclusion that Sol is actually super evil and manipulating everything even though we've seen precedent for that in Palpatine? I did see some theories floating around that Sol was the sith, but the theories against Korril seem much more prevalent.

Idk, strong female characters like Korril (in extension Nynaeve from the Wheel of Time) have a special place in my heart because they're so like me, and I AM so used to seeing them be the 'evil' one for the narrative based on that, so seeing everyone jump quickly to 'because they're not super soft and nice (read: not feminine like they should be), that means they must be evil!!!' really strikes a nerve.

It's a valid theory given how little we know so far, but it does feel more based in prejudice than actual evidence at this point.

[cryiling]

can we hear more about the hip hip dancers revalink au

(in reference to this post)

OMG OFC 🫶🫶 here's a couple snippets from that au since I'm too lazy to write an actual fic for it 🙏

actually the first year they both auditioned for the hip hop competition team, they were both rejected because they had spent the whole audition side-eying each other and when they were put in the same freestyle group, they got all up in each other's faces and were too focused on trying to outdo each other to really pay attention to the actual audition. so the director rejected both of them, saying they needed to get whatever rivalry they had under control because everyone on the team needs to be able to work together and support one another

(what the director didn't know was that this had been an ongoing rivalry for years. they had first met at a walk-in kpop dance workshop, and when it became clear that the two were the top dancers in the class, revali felt the need to prove that he was the superior dancer, meanwhile link was annoyed at this guy who was obnoxiously bragging about his dancing and his kpop dance cover channel on youtube, so he decided to quietly make passive-aggressive remarks about how people who think kpop dance is real dance are dumb.)

(when they both got home that night, they absolutely googled each other. link found revali's dance account and did NOT subscribe thank you very much (but he did watch all of his covers to privately critique them). revali found link's contemporary dance portfolio and bookmarked it to his browser so he could watch all the videos)

(two months later, link decides to attend a hip hop combo class at the studio near him, and you'll never guess who he sees there: yeah it's revali. in the last 20 minutes of class when everyone gets split into groups to record the dance, surprise surprise: revali and link are in a group together. the two go full out and by the end they're both sweaty, and frustrated at being equally matched at the dance. they both come back to this class every week.)

anyways, revali is super pissed at being rejected from the team and link is frustrated that this self-absorbed idiot cost him the spot on the team. but the words of the director echo in the back of their minds, and by the time auditions roll around again, they manage to keep their cool and are both accepted onto the team. during the competition classes they are professionally cool to one another, but without that outlet to vent their frustrations at each other, their rivalry in the combo classes get much more heated

btw in case you're wondering what type of songs they dance to, check out this playlist of songs I learned dances to in my classes 🤭 esp any given sunday bc the VIBES OF THAT SONG omg peak sexy revalink

we talked a little bit already about them being assigned a duet for competition, and them practicing and falling over each other and spending late nights at the studio freestyling 🤭 I imagine at some point during one of these practice sessions (after they've warmed up to each other a little bit), as they're taking a break, link turns on that that by psy and just starts dancing to it for funsies. and revali looks at him with disbelief but then snorts in amusement, pushes himself off the floor where he had been sitting by the mirror, and joins link in the dance since ofc he knows the dance too ✋

and it turns into a bit of a game, they take turns playing increasingly obscure kpop songs to see if the other knows the dance for it, and if not they just start making up a dance for it. and omg at one point they turn on love dive by ive and they both know it and so at that part right before the chorus with the point and body roll, they even do it in formation facing each other, and it makes link blush and throws revali off beat a little AJDBAKDN

anyways after that link invites revali to go with him to an annual random dance play event that he attends every year, and it's their first date!! 🥺🥺 (not really. revali will adamantly deny that it was a date to anyone that listens. but later when they start dating he'll look back on that time and his eyes will go all soft as he remembers what it was like to share his love of kpop and dancing with someone that understands the level of passion he has for both of them)

after they start dating, they decide to compete in a kpop dance cover competition together! they do guerrilla by ateez which I'm ngl y'all it's an incredibly difficult and tiring dance, which means it's perfect for the two of them 🥰🙏 they win first place ofc, the judges are impressed by their synchrony and stage presence and chemistry with each other! they're so ecstatic, revali picks link up on stage and twirls him around a little as they're both absorbed in their own little world with eyes only for each other (someone records and posts this to tik tok, which immediately goes viral with ppl commenting "me and who??😭✋" and "if I don't have what they do then I don't want it")

this would be hard to do as a duet since there's so many dancers in it, so I would imagine they would try to get their competition team to do this with them, but I NEED revalink to cover btbt by bi because the dance for it is SOO GOOD I'm begging y'all to watch it immediately

this post quickly derailed and I cannot believe I wrote this much ohmygod 💀 anyways hope you enjoyed reading me self projecting my love of dance onto my two favorite blorbos 🫶

[kosherkept]

hey I'm converting right now and I just wanted to say that I had the exact same experience, I reached out to my Rabbi at the tail end of the intro to Judaism class and had to wait about a year for the next one to start, I'm not sure if you know but they might be hesitant to talk with you about conversion because it's custom to turn down potential converts 3 times before letting them even begin converting so if they seem like they aren't giving you a chance just keep trying and keep in mind that rabbis are really busy, I would recommend reading some Jewish books and listening to Jewish podcasts in the time between now and your intro to Judaism class starting, it's a great way to get more involved in Judaism and go ahead and start learning more about it formally while waiting, I'm a big fan of Living a Jewish life by Anita Diamont and her other book Choosing a Jewish life, but I'd be more than happy to send you the list of books from my Rabbi sponsoring my conversion if you want! It's definitely a frustrating wait while waiting for the class but it's absolutely worth it once you get here

hi! i'm definitley well aware of the 3x rejection tradition, but that wasn't what was going on. i didn't go into too much detail about the conversations i had with each of the rabbis so i dont blame you for assuming that might be it, but it was more of a dismissal than a rejection. especially since i kept going back to one of them after being "rejected"/dismissed and if anything it felt like he was actually bothered by me rather than like, paying attention to my persistence, like how i imagine he would have been had it been tradition. i'm not sure how to describe how we talked without trying to flat-out quote them directly which feels a little strange to me lol

several other people have also recommended reading books and doing research in my own time and trust me i have been!! i have seven or eight books that i own that i'm getting to one by one, and "choosing a jewish life" is actually my current read (although i do have Opinions about it that i'll share later once i'm finished with it). one of the shuls i visited when i was trying to meet with the rabbis also has a reading list and i've chosen several books off it it already, too, even if i don't end up converting there. i definitely thought that was a smart idea for them to have (you have to pick a certain number of both fiction and non-fiction books off their approved list in order to complete conversion)

i will say though (and i'm not sure if anyone else has had a similar experience), one of the rabbis actually advised me against doing my own research about judaism of any kind. he said he believed most of the things people discuss on the internet are false (although he didnt really specify what things, which is...annoying, to say the least), and that without the guidance of a rabbi i was wasting my time. which....felt a little unkind, almost? but he was the one i liked the least, so who knows.

but part of my post was also that it almost feels like half-assing it to read jewish literature and continue learning, but not actually do anything to begin the conversion process. that was why i said if the next rabbi i speak to does the same thing,* i'm going to consider fully putting *everything* on pause, including reading, until i can actually take the class. that way it won't feel like a constant reminder of what i could be doing instead, had things worked out differently. yknow?

-

*which he may not!! i checked his shul's website and they aren't affiliated with the same board of rabbis that the other ones were, so he may not even require the class to convert at all?? i do think the class would be beneficial and provide a sense of structure, but time-wise (also money and location-wise. as someone who relies on a shitty public transit system to get around, the class meetings changing location every week to a different shul on the complete other side of town is going to be absolutely horrendous), it's not "optimal" (not sure what other word to use). i definitely have both questions and concerns about it but i'll be able to ask the rabbi if everything goes well :)

[unproduciblesmackdown]

april autism acceptance month posting, the musings of (going for Self Acceptance as well) from the desk of milo unproduciblesmackdown....

mostly just having reflected on like, huh, might be that By And Large one is more nonspeaking than one thinks....that i've Been like "well sure in person i'm usually markedly Quite Quiet but also secretly a mile a minute chatterbox." like already aware of factoring in the Quietness in terms of like, generally always having been in everyday situations where i don't Want to talk. which also means being aware of like, someone the other day was talking about how the ""normal"" approach (which is not even simply Non Autistic, just the "ideals" in any sense that are Not That, yet positioned as such, to the disempowering Othering of others/anything else) is that verbal exchanges are often nigh exclusively about coming into it with some Goal in mind and just being dead set on that exact inflexible outcome / the other person's input can probably really only get in the way of that. used to be asked How Was Work by family and if i answered in the accurate negative would be told how it wasn't that bad actually; then why even ask. nowadays i know i'm virtually only spoken to to say something At Me; the other day frustrated by this & had an "exchange" where, when being [Talked At] for a sec, didn't really verbally respond at all, which was not considered a wrench in the proceedings in the least, as i expected........relevantly as well, i'm v aware of Talking becoming markedly more difficult if drained &/or stressed (or, w/immediate relevancy, the Talking being especially miserable atm, causing that exhaustion/stress w/high efficiency). that somewhat more Freestyle "normal" communication can include "you have to speak to acknowledge another person's presence, or its hostile" and that speaking is the especially Hollow Scriptathon of things like, getting hit with the "how are you [misgendering]" which, absorb the punch of misgenderment, gear up for Speaking which also is already "wrong," too much delay, remember that you never answer How Are You with how you are, and sometimes just not Pretending to answer and just repeating the question is not particularly more negatively regarded than any other way you approach it

musing on the [it's all bizarre but definitely getting shit for being audhd / nonbinary] childhood / first twenty yrs of life mysteries, like, well when being lectured as it were, which was nothing if not an intensified hollow scriptathon (see: the perfectly harmonious resonance in "how you navigate existing around an abuser" and "how you navigate existing anywhere but expressly personally friendly/safe spaces, being autistic") too demeaning to be borne, where it would be wrong to not make eye contact, then making forced eye contact (and learning how to just like, approach it as a [go through the motions] detached thing) was also wrong, it was wrong to not seem distressed and also to seem distressed; and it's like oh yeah back then & even now i can be as Stressed as anything but there's always a shift where if i make myself Talk i may cry like immediately, which i virtually never do out of otherwise being unhappy/stressed. there's how one of my most genuine friendships in elementary school (the autistic time as well of: many/more friendships from all public school times were other people Deciding we should be "friends;" sometimes this being like, the friend In Charge, and then: me, conveniently) was one where i don't think we actually Spoke. may not be a typical neurotypical thing. there's also the fact our being Distracted by interacting, that is, [not talking] during not even a lesson where the stakes were like "you haven't put this sheet in your folder at the exact time Instructions demanded you to, no sooner or later???" was punished more dramatically (and individually. classic) than i ever saw anyone get for Being Distracted / Not Paying Attention or certainly for talking. very nd of me for that too; like the Especial disdain teachers would have if i Was talking and too caught up in the exchange to notice it was supposed to be the quiet times now, which of course was wilfull disrespect for authority.....like oh but believe me i have that too lmfao, and these instances do not counter it. f for my friendship with jacqueline b/c we weren't allowed to sit next to each other and the disproportionate/extraordinary qualities of the response made it so it was hardly clear we were even allowed to interact at all, for all intents and purposes. great

certainly verbality at all can be a whole challenge too overall, but w/focus on the speaking....truly the mile a minute speaking / voluminous writing of things Happens, but it's sure when i get to talk About something, and the High Motivation boost of [whatever's being talked about] is quite necessary b/c it sure still takes effort lol....This is taking effort, to be sure. meanwhile there's also the damper of like, people's Disinterest / Dismissal meaning that just b/c you talk doesn't mean anyone hears you, to an extent it's nigh literal lol, beyond double empathy problem misunderstanding (plus that: ppl know they don't have to understand, &/or can choose to (pretend to) misunderstand / know they don't get it, but don't have to) there's also just like, not bothering to process what you say; being the one talked over like you weren't saying anything, lack of any response at all like you weren't saying anything, someone else cutting in and you may as well no longer be here / nth wheeling in any group. the times i've had to say something which needs a response / to be absorbed, and fighting for my life doing so / reiterating like half a dozen times / repeating this later, multiple times, b/c i know someone may give you the "politeness" of Looking At You / nominal spoken stock responses, while not absorbing it / forgetting it after 5 sec..........to be sure, times i've had an extensive, specific, belabored exchange (plus alllll the extra effort to emphasize Amicability in it) that got such responses, only to have it later clear they didn't actually absorb the point they'd apparently gone "right, okay" to. times i've [that] and then 5 min later had the person i'd talked to come over to be like "oh did you say [the thing i said to them]" only b/c some third party had overheard and actually processed it, then in turn had what They conveyed to that person i'd talked to actually listened to; had "i am once again asking" agonies multiple times over months & months only eventually fulfilled, spontaneously, by someone else entirely....

also that, when i Was able to having amicable, comfortable, in-person exchanges, my ""small talk"" friendly engagement to nonhostilely acknowledge someone / have an exchange involves Verbal Bits (running gag for Dinnermaking Convo to pretend to be on iron chef, and all named chef geoff, for example) or Nonverbal Ones (entering one's peripheral vision and dancing until acknowledged, to be funny, or ignored, also to be funny) or even simply that the amicability can come from other people, in spite of it all, by just not interpreting my operating while being myself and not constantly going out of my way to try to expressively reassure someone i'm friendly to them being met with [people just not deciding they hate me and/or i am beneath them] like, some great times lol. friendships where we didn't Really start talking for eons, and i go "guess people gotta be patient" like well sure lol. and then they gotta like how i Do interact

and the next bit of "can't believe you keep learning; realizing things" is just going like "ohh wait, was thinking of one's inherent value within a framework of [noninherent value you can so totally Bootstraps Earn we swear]" lol like....even in terms of like "nd people are the backbone of your fandom" type things like, well yeah they are; and that "sometimes people think it's neat that you can draw" like yeah it is and sometimes they really are; but that it's like, but Forget It re: thinking of that like "well so that Makes Up For [being autistic] as it might usually negatively impact socializing by 'normal' standards" like, to hell with making up for anything. i like to post about interests and draw about them and it's fun when people enjoy them and it can be fun to Talk About something / interact through that; it's not like "ableism: over" nor making up for anything, and what can really come of thinking it has to be Valued by how it might make other people see You as more inherently worthwhile yourself than they otherwise would've, right. i'm like "well i don't always express myself xyz ways but at least i do in other ways i suppose" but end the sentence before the But. i'm not As Good(tm) As Allistic through the [expressing myself] i do through drawing, and that's fine b/c autistic ppl having talents people value isn't the antiableism key lol. next i can be [tfw autistic ppl try to go Above & Beyond at work to "make up for" being autistic] or employers being like "hey maybe hire autistic people" not to be Inspirationally Inclusive in theory or whatever but b/c it's like, they'll be exploitable / valuable as exploited employee. like how autistic people get fired or burned out and then it's like whoops, we need like 5 new hires to replace them; who wasn't promoted, paid, or recognized as doing 6 ppl's work. everything being [popularity contest] actually. not to say Posting For Fun is the exact same as formal job lmfao nor randos like employers; but essences remain, see: that resonance with [reacting to abuser's attention] behavior and [interacting with randos out & about, trying to be deemed Friendly Normal Correct enough] behavior. the throughline that people won't regard you as having inherent value unless they regard people as having inherent value, on principle

i do have peak success like, an art post is very tl;dr billboard for Your Existence lol. and then if people are interested enough in whatever brand of [saying shit] i do? probably promising start to whether interactions with me won't be [their interest is exhausted within a day] lol. find some fellow nd people by crossing paths via interest, which is a Talk About Something thing. and even then, of course, you're not guaranteed friends with every other nd person. Spontaneous Alignments, everyone's friend....while at this juncture it's like, hmm, maybe i Am actually not like. theoretically interested in [i want to have new friendships] lmao. thinking about what they're supposed to be? what i could even think of them hypothetically being? invokes no [i want that] feelings. thinking of someone else saying, in a different context, how he doesn't think anyone's Guaranteed any kind of companionship, which i agree with (vs. ppl talking about it like Bootstraps Merit like yes you can Deserve a romantic partner, and Deserve friends too, and a general appeal/likability/personableness will be concomitant w/a Deserving person); thinking of someone else talking abt, in a different context, how her experience being racially othered means she just doesn't end up liking being around people at all / prefers being alone. the first guy talking about how he doesn't Preclude new relationships but he also approaches w/deliberation like, navigating being content being alone. thinking abt stuff talking about [autistic ppl who want romantic relationships] that mention ppl having to go ahead and work on being okay with the idea they may very well never have one. the questioning of [relationships] and [community] in a consciously political context; what's it mean for someone to have Relationships, be in a Community, would that be Required of them for them to deserve / get to expect to receive [xyz] that everyone theoretically would. thinking of relationality as acknowledgment of the realities of ways things, incl people, affect each other, the results of that

that's about all lol might "ideally" be more nonspeaking than i gave myself credit for; only shifting towards "i give myself inherent value on principle and can only be regarded as having inherent value by others Also on principle" like no [bootstrapping earning shit] as a way to also see value in what i do either lol

[walkingstackofbooks]

DS9 3x04 Equilibrium thoughts (I'm re-watching, so there may be future spoilers)

Odo is stirring so intently, it's sweet how genuinely he finds this interesting <3

Julian looks so scared of beets... and to be fair, the idea of having to eat beetroot just to not offend someone else is awful, I understand completely. *shudder* Tfw someone makes you try something just because you "haven't had it properly" before.

I love Kira's civilan clothes <3

"You look so cute." I had the same thought, Kira!

Ah! This episode!

"None of Dax's hosts, even Jadzia, had any musical ability." It is noticeable that sometimes she's more Dax than Jadzia.

Huh, it's more believable that Sisko made an illegal move than that you weren't paying attention?

Oh no, it's something deeper than that...

Kira's astonishment. She knows something is definitely wrong.

Creepy mask person

CREEPY MASK PERSON

Yeah this is disturbing

Jadzia's back <3

"the only major trauma the Dax symbiont ever suffered..." Seven lifetimes and only one major trauma?! I wonder what is defined as major... And then Jadzia comes along and lives her life 😅

Weird to start talking to Sisko and say "I suggest we get her back" - I'm guessing this is Starfleet Getting Permission From The Commander Speak, but also she's right in front of you, Julian, don't talk about her like she's not there?

I do love Jadzia and Julian's friendship <3

"When I was younger I was terrified of [doctors]." I do not remember this line, and that's so fascinating! Again, fits in so well with the GE stuff.

"I used to think that if I didn't behave, they'd make sure I got sick." This is actually heartbreaking to think of little Jules terrified on Adigeon Prime.

"I decided that I wanted to know what they knew, be as smart as they were... And you know what I learned [at medical school? That all I really wanted to do was help people." He's such a goodie and I love him to bits

"Now if that little story didn't put you to sleep, I don't know what will." Aw, I think he's been more vulnerable and revealing than he meant to. Awkward, self-aware Julian <3

I was very tense from when he offered her a bed that some sort of cringeworthy joke or comment would be made.... but no! A whole conversation without any awkward creepiness added in for no reason! Progress!

I read a fanfic the other day which described the uniform as having a violet undershirt and I had genuinely never noticed it before, I'd always thought it was grey, and now I cannot stop noticing it.

"Oh. Oh, that is not good. Not good at all. Tell me, how bad are the dreams?" So the guardian saying this straight out is terrifying, but also pretty validating

We always see symbionts having to be transferred host to host straight away, do they ever return to the pools or is this just where they begin their lives?

Julian's anger - "How do you know that unless you try!" and Sisko's calming hand, although I imagine he's just as frustrated. #siskoshir

Love it when Sisko delivers a threat, he's always so cool and composed.

"It's her life and her decision." Yesss, Sisko

Wait, were they going to just operate on her and take the symbiont out without letting her know?! That's awful! But it looks like they wouldn't have woken her up without Sisko's intervention even though it's evidently possible! What!!!

Saying "Julian" as soon as she wakes up - she may be scared of doctors, but she trusts her friend :3

"If you want to know who you are, it's important to know who you've been." For you more than most....

Solid episode, I can't believe the food scene was at the beginning, that seems so long ago!